Magpie Recruitment 1-3 Vale County
28/10/18
Sheen Common
‘Magpies knocked off their perch’
Vale made it four in a row in the SSFL League 4 with a hard fought 3-1 win away to Magpie Recruitment at Sheen Common.
Vale Starting XI
The starting line up saw A. Cheshire continue in goal, with Woodbridge, Beck, Strang and Brazzil sitting in front. The centre of midfield saw Given and Slater start together with Peattie, Young and Moran in behind Clements as the spine of the team remained similar once again. Whilst in a lovely setting, the pitch was (we are informed) the largest possible under FA regulations, with the goals also roughly a foot taller than usual - something one Vale player noticed more than others…
Magpie started the game well, with Vale initially struggling to get to grips with the large pitch and being their own worst enemy a lot of the time. For the first 20 minutes, neither team created anything clear cut, but it was Magpie who were looking the more dangerous on the ball. The referee, Momchil Ivanov, was letting a lot go - including when a Magpie player caught the ball with Vale on the break (deciding it was not a bookable offence) - incensing various members of the boys in pink. Ivanov first feigned to book Moran for his complaints, showing what a joker he is, before Woodbridge saw red minutes later and was told by Mr. Ivanov that ‘we are not at the ships, why are you shouting Barney?’. No we are not Momchil, but we are playing a football match abiding by FA laws (laws not rules A.Cheshire).
As Vale grew into the game more, Slater had a shot that was held by the Magpie keeper, and Moran and Clements were both inches away from converting a Woodbridge cross. 30 minutes in, an ironic cheer went up from Rowlands, Foley and Beer on the sidelines, as Vale were finally given a free kick. Moments later, however, was a(nother) goal of the season contender from Clements. Following a goal kick from Cheshire, the ball was worked back inside from the right, before Given and Peattie got the ball to Clements 25 yards out. A student of the game, Clements has been practising his Eric Cantona impression down Clapham Common for many a week - and all the efforts paid off as he made full use of the extra foot in the goals by spectacularly chipping the Magpie keeper (0-1). Efforts into the Sturridge dance were also appreciated, definitely the ‘best’ celebration of the season so far.
HT: 0-1 ‘the world is a colourful place, not black and white’
Humphrey returned following a few weeks out with a knee injury, coming on for Brazzil, as Moran pushed to left back and Vale switched to a 4-3-3. However, straight from kick off, Magpie played a defence splitting pass down the Vale left to a winger, who converted at the second time of asking following a good initial save from Cheshire (1-1). Vale heads did not drop, however, and the change in shape provided a much better platform both in defence and for attacks. Following a brief spell of Magpie pressure, Vale came close, as a free kick from Moran was attacked by the pale, lanky Swedish frame of Strang, and headed just over - with the Magpie linesman flagging in suspicious circumstances.
The goal did come for Vale though, as Slater harried a Magpie defender into a poor touch, before cutting in from just inside the box and finishing well (1-2). Magpie responded to going behind well, and only a (it’s painful to write this) quite stunning block by Douglas Patrick Beck prevented them going level once more, throwing himself in front of a goalbound effort. In the 74th minute (so he says), Rowlands entered the fray for Clements, before getting Vale’s third in the 75th minute (so he says). Good work from Young fed the ball to Rowlands, who took an eternity, almost allowing all the Magpie defenders to catch up to him - before cooly slotting the ball in (1-3). The chicken dance was out, and somewhere Kevin Nolan had a wry smile to himself.
Beck decided that 3-1 was time to party, and having first stood by a corner kick, then proceeded to attempt an overhead kick from Rowlands’ knock down - thankfully the result was what we expect 99.9% of the time, a swing and a miss. The smile and grin as he jogged back to his usual spot was what we expect 99.9% of the time too. Magpie’s number 10 had seen enough from his team by this point though, and among a few other comments, referred to his teammates as ‘cowardly pricks’. Personally thought they were alright guys, but it seems that doesn’t run through the Magpie ethos. Peattie was told he was shit by a Magpie defender, and then fired over from 6 yards out (don’t let such comments get to you fella), and Young then was denied a clear cut penalty by Ivanov, who told him it was his fault. Momchil, you are a truly fascinating character.
The remainder of the game was managed well by Vale, who go 6 points clear at the top of the SSFL League 4 table.
#daretodream
SSFL League 4 Table (as of 28/10/18)
FT: 1-3 (Clements (36), Slater (63), Rowlands (75))
Floom Man of the Match Award: Strang
Solfix Dick of the Day Award: Beck
Today's post-match meal brought to you by Ole Gunnar Rowlands